The Toy Story

One time when I was young, I remember going to Toys 'R' Us with my mom and brother. I think I was around 10, possibly younger. As we were getting ready to head over to the register to pay and leave, my eye caught the most wonderful toy ever: a real-looking rifle. Yes, I was also a huge tom boy when I was a kid and I loved and played with every weapon I ever laid eyes on. I had to have them all. So, naturally, when I saw this gigantic rifle, I went nuts. My mom refused to get it for me and I threw the biggest tantrum EVER. I cried so hard and even my brother got mad at me and told me to stop acting that way. Eventually, my mom gave in and bought it for me. She was absolutely furious and didn't speak to me for a while, but I didn't care. I had my beautiful rifle and it still brings a smile to my face whenever I see it sitting in my garage. It was my most substantial piece of arsenal during play time as a kid.

But I wonder, did the end really justify the means? If I knew that sitting there and crying my eyes out upset my mom to such a degree, would I have been able to stop myself and let go of the thing I wanted most at that time in order to make her happy? As a child, it's virtually impossible to let go of the thing we want most in the heat of the moment. We're too selfish and much too spoiled. It's part of the nature within the age. As an adult, however, how would I handle looking at that rifle, knowing how perfect it would be to take it home with me that day, but having no mom to buy it for me? Would I stand there in the toy aisle crying endlessly over a situation that is now hopeless?

Part of me thinks I'm still a selfish kid. I cry when I can't have all the things I want. It drives me mad. The only thing that's changed is that if I could go back in time and see how bad I made my mom feel at that particular moment, I would let go of that toy (no matter how many good memories I have of playing with it) and just think only of her happiness.