one to make me dinner (or have dinner with); no one to wish me goodnight; no one to call my own anymore.
When I woke up at 3 a.m. last night and couldn't sleep because I was gasping for air for the next two hours in bed, I really wanted to call someone and
cry. And then I kind of thought that me not being around wouldn't be the worst thing. I know this entry's rather self-deprecating but in all honesty, I feel as though I'm
barely staying afloat. I feel like the most disliked person in the world. When your sibling is in his own world, when your mom blatantly ignores you
as you're speaking to her and you're left with awkward silence, and the people you love the most aren't there anymore...it can be excruciatingly painful.
On the outside, I smile a lot. I still know how to laugh, talk, and enjoy life. On the inside, I'm unraveling. I want to fast forward to the part where I'm
supposed to be successful, happy, and can kiss my special someone when I get home from work--and then play with Sunshine and Luna before I go
to bed. But for now, I'm here. Trapped. Emotional. Expiring.
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